Please note most of the jokes are written by "Journalin" and all of them have imaginary characters. Any possible resemblance with real people is accidentally for sure. Mr. Boo, fictional comedy character, has been created by "Journalin" for ease of understanding.
Police pulled over a car. The driver ran away. Officer caught him and asked him to breathe to check his blood alcohol level. He said, "But that's impossible sir." Officer asked, "why?" He answered, "I'm breathless now. May we do it tomorrow?"
Doctor said to patient's husband, "Your wife's saved from heart attack but she's paralyzed in half body now." He said, "My chance doctor! She never completed a thing in her life."
What did the car say to the cow? "Mooove! Mo-oove!" -"Moo Moo! I love u too!" "Journalin"
Why was Mr. Boo inspecting the river?
- Something fishy was going on!
Mrs. Boo told him: "Draw the curtains." He answered: "I don't have pen." His wife said, "Then use the pencil idiot!" "Journalin"
A guy called all of his friends and asked them if they were happy with their brain. When they asked him why, he said, "The doctor suggested me to change my stupid mind." "Journalin"
Two people bet. First person says, "tails". They toss the coin 5 times and each time it lands on heads. First person wins at the end, but now there are 5 angry dogs chasing them... "Journalin"
Someone knocked neighbor's door: "Knock, knock! Anybody home?" The lady answered: "Oh no, haven't you heard of neighbors? We are on trip." -"Will you be home tomorrow?" - "Of course not, we went to Hawaii and won't be back by next month dear." "Journalin"
A woman said to her husband, "I'm a poor bad luck woman, using the old furniture for more than 5 years when next door woman changing them every year. You're lucky for having such a wife." - "Completely opposite dear, because you're older than everything in this house and I'm still using you without complaining after years." "Journalin"
A cop told Boo to lock his door, because they had a criminal on the loose. Boo said, "Not a problem officer. We have lots of ropes, I'll donate a roll." "Journalin"
Old grandmother asked, "Why are you sad and late dear?" He answered, "I brought up debts in company." She said,- "What? I can't hear, talk louder." He cried, "I brought up debts granny. I'm so sorry." She said, "Thanks god! Where are the pets? Why in hurry?" He repeated frustrated louder. She answered, "You brought them up all by yourself? You should be tired now. Let me finish. Where are they?" "Journalin"
Do you know what Boo told the boss at first day when he said: "Mr. Boo you need to know some rules here. If you spill the beans you'll be dead meat in a blink." -"Don't worry sir, My balancing is perfect. That's perhaps how my friend suggested the job to me." "Journalin"
My friend! Do you know how to make sure to hit the nail on head?
-Ya, always keep them long!
What part of the alley do ghosts like the most? -The dead end!
What room do ghosts avoid the most? -The living room!